There are some days I do think my life is not a very good one. While reading the blog of a colleague from the making of a flavour of Ubuntu, I got confused by the references to an au pair and the sleep schedule of a child. I have been so tied down with my job that people in my peer group of preference that I have had to be away from for so long have moved on and grown.

What do I have to show for this? I am at the top of the career ladder for my job position. The only movement within my occupational specialty as a civil servant is from journeyman to leading technical specialist or from journeyman to supervisor. Currently within the directorate we are overloaded on people already trained for the leading technical specialist and supervisor positions so there are more people pre-qualified than slots to fill unless we start booting people out of the directorate. We could ship off people trained as leading technical specialists and supervisors to the other nine directorates but they've got their own versions of the same problem.

My peer group by default is not a healthy bunch. Somebody got taken to the hospital for a heart attack last week. Several of the newest hires are getting anxious enough to want to quit and I've been helping try to talk them into staying through their current commission at least. This particular workplace has a reputation for being toxic and it isn't due to unremediated asbestos still found in the building.

Working on building a "social life" does not go all that well. There's even a singles site within the church that I have been trying to participate on. The problem there is that within the church we're really big on text. In the eyes of far too many prostitutes and tax collectors are deemed the same thing which are hard-core sinners you shouldn't associate with apparently. If I'm striking out in the fairly small pond of a niche single site within my denomination I'm not keen on trying eHarmony or Christian Mingle.

I don't know where I'm going with all this. I am feeling old with yet another birthday coming up in September as a childless bachelor. I am trying to sneak in time for rehabilitative therapy which would mean time away from work to take care of myself. An extended period of medically-managed weight loss and supervised exercise/strength training would improve my health dramatically. Unfortunately there's no way to fit that in alongside work right now due to the tour of duty's structure. Two-a-days/bootcamp may be needed for getting that off the ground rather than simply following a Billy Blanks DVD.

I hate times of unknowns. This is one of them. Things will settle out soon, I hope.